Gufa: Learning Cultural Humility Through an Ancient Newar Rite of Passage
In the heart of Newar culture, there is a rite of passage called Gufa, a tradition rich with symbolism, history, and meaning. It is the third major milestone in a Newar girl’s life, and for centuries, families have practiced it with deep pride and devotion.
Recently, my own children completed their Gufa ceremony. I’ll admit, this tradition challenges me. But it also reminds me of one of the most important lessons in cultural competence:
Just because I don’t fully understand a practice doesn’t mean the practice is wrong.
Just because it’s unfamiliar to me doesn’t mean it lacks value.
And just because it sits outside my worldview doesn’t mean it deserves judgment.
Cultural competence begins where certainty ends and curiosity begins.
What Is Gufa?
Traditionally, a girl entering Gufa lives in seclusion for up to twelve days.
During this time:
She remains in a darkened room
She cannot see sunlight
She cannot see her own reflection
She does not interact with men AND men aren’t allowed to hear her
She receives care, protection, and ritual guidance from the women in her family
When the seclusion ends, she is led out with her head covered.
She first looks at her reflection in a pool of water, a symbolic moment of transformation, and then she looks at the sun, her ritual bridegroom.
From this moment forward, she is considered married to the sun, ensuring she is spiritually protected throughout her life.
Like many families balancing tradition with modern life, we participated in this ritual. My children remained in seclusion for one night instead of twelve, so they wouldn’t miss school or exams. But even in this shortened form, the meaning remains powerful.
When Culture Challenges Us: A Personal Reflection
As a woman who grew up in Western culture, parts of this tradition are challenging for me to process.
The symbolism of marrying the sun and the centuries-old expectations around marriage and womanhood; these concepts don’t align with the worldview I hold.
And yet:
Cultural competence means making space for complexity.
It means acknowledging the discomfort and choosing curiosity instead of judgment.
It means saying:
“I don’t fully understand this, but I want to.”
“This isn’t my belief system, but I respect the meaning it holds for others.”
“This tradition isn’t mine, but it isn’t for me to redefine.”
In the ceremony, I see something deeper than symbolism.
I see women protecting and guiding the next generation.
I see resilience woven through hundreds, even thousands, of years of history.
I see family, community, and continuity.
Culture isn’t always meant to be comfortable, but it is always meant to be honoured.
What Gufa Teaches Us as Nurses
As healthcare providers, we often encounter beliefs, rituals, or health practices that differ from our own. Cultural competence doesn’t mean adopting those beliefs. It means:
Listening without judgment
Asking thoughtful questions
Understanding the meaning behind practices
Recognizing our own cultural lens
Avoiding the assumption that our way is the default or superior way
Gufa reminds me that traditions exist within a broader context: historical, spiritual, social, and emotional.
We see the ritual, but families experience the meaning.
This is the kind of awareness that strengthens nursing care everywhere.
A Lesson in Humility, Respect, and Connection
Watching my children experience Gufa was deeply moving.
I didn’t agree with every aspect.
I didn’t fully understand every layer.
But that isn’t the point.
The point is participating with love, respect, and openness.
And that’s the heart of cultural competence:
We don’t have to agree with a tradition to honour it.
We don’t have to understand everything to respect it.
We simply have to stay humble, curious, and willing to learn.
Nepal has a way of teaching these lessons naturally, one tradition at a time.